Showing posts with label random. Show all posts
Showing posts with label random. Show all posts

How to free your sneeze

At one time or another, everyone has encountered a sneeze that tries and tries but never seems to come out. Some invisible fetters restrain it, barely containing it in your nose, taunting you with its presence but never actually letting it out. If you've always wished to set your sneezes free, I have the secret solution. For only $5.99 you can learn how to never suffer sneeze bondage again! In just eight easy steps I will teach you how to free your sneeze.



Step 1. Identify the sneeze that is stuck.
Step 2. Hunt down the nearest (full) kleenex box or roll of toilet paper.
Step 3. Roll a corner of the kleenex or toilet paper into a point.
Step 4. Insert kleenex or toilet paper point up nose as far as you can.
Step 5. Move point around slowly until you find that special ticklish spot in the back of your nose that triggers uncontrollable sneezing. 
Step 6. Keep kleenex/toilet paper in your nose in that spot and sneeze until you are satisfied.
Step 7. Remove point and throw used kleenex or toilet paper in the garbage.
Step 8. Wash your hands.

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Pillow fight!

I have the best job in the world, apparently!  At what other job do you get PAID to beat children with pillows?  Seriously, it was a good night.  Some of us started out with a few games of Twister...which we promptly abandoned once we heard there was a pillow fight going on upstairs.  Twenty or so kids and a couple councillors running, screaming, and beating on each other with pillows equals a lot of happy kids.  Then we "quieted" them down with GuitarHero (one of the kids bought it yesterday at the mall).  Now I have a little bit of free time.  Not much else to share...except a favourite poem of mine that I re-discovered today.




"Earth" by John Hall Wheelock

"A planet doesn't explode of itself," said drily
The Martian astronomer, gazing off into the air--
"That they were able to do it is proof that highly
Intelligent beings must have been living there."

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Roses

Lovely sunny afternoon...I'm so glad I have a laptop!  Now I can blog on the grass in the sun while listening to worship music in Mandarin.  Can life get any better?  I submit it cannot!

Since a group of Taiwanese students arrived late last night, they had to stay behind and do placement tests while the other kids went off to their English classes.  After the test, Matt and I took them on a tour of the campus (like we did for the first batch of kids).  Thanks to these two tours, I have changed my opinion of...roses.  

Yes, roses.  I've never really liked roses.  I mean, if someone were to give me a rose (or a bouquet of roses), I would receive it/them graciously, and appreciate the thought behind them.  But they are not my kind of flowers.  I like wild flowers (among which, ironically, wild roses rank very high on my list of preferred flowers!).  I remember a number of summers ago I was rather obsessed with the story of Beauty and the Beast and read several different versions/variations of the story.  All VERY different and all VERY good.  One of them was told from the perspective of The Beast, an unfortunate Persian prince who was turned into a lion and as such was chased from his kingdom.  This particular prince loved roses above all other flowers and had a huge rose garden back in Persia that he had spent many many hours working in.  I never understood this obsession of his.  Until now.

Here on the university campus there is a rose garden.  I'll admit I groaned inwardly when I saw we were going in...but inside it's so pretty!  So many shades of red, pink, orange, yellow...and the SMELL!  Sun-kissed roses in a slight breeze....

Maybe not quite as close to Heaven as the smell of pineapples, but it's definitely up there!

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About Me

I was born and I will die. I eat, breath, sleep, talk, and periodically raise my voice. For a little variation I read, watch movies, and walk on the beach. I am a Christian, a Canadian, and a homeschool graduate. When it rains I stare at the windshield wipers and get mad when the wipers move a little too fast for the stream of water that is desperately trying to get away. When it's sunny I walk down to the beach and think about amnesiacs washing up on the shore. When it snows I stay inside with a book and curl up in a blanket. I like CSI Las Vegas, Criminal Minds, and Firefly. I like dark chocolate and dandelions and daisies and wild roses. And RED.

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